Dear Slutty Pants Fence Sitter I found the following question in the May 2009 issue of GQ and was disappointed with their answer: “Q: I’m a full-bearded guy losing the hair on my head. I want to shave my head but keep the beard. Do I need to be an anarchist biker to do it? [...]

A few days ago, an anal trainer kit came in the mail. I like to think of my three black, soft jelly rubber butt-plugs as baby, mama, and daddy bear cocks. The big one intimidates me, but the two smaller plugs are right up my alley. I lubed up and put in the smallest plug [...]

Dear Slutty-Pants Fence Sitter, I love the movement of individuals who are claiming their fat identities! In our culture that promotes strictly emaciated (or ripped, as the case may be) and nubile images of “beauty”, I think it is so important for people who don’t fit the mold to stand up and declare themselves as [...]

Dear Slutty-Pants Fence-Humper, How do I make asking for consent a turn-on for me and my partner? I’ve read the zines, I’ve practiced, I’ve even attended an Eroticizing Consent workshop. But my awkward asking woes don’t seem to be disappearing very fast. It feels like the questions and check-ins are separate from the sex, instead [...]

I watched the Twitter Feed minutes after the life-sentencing of Allen Ray Andrade, the murderer of Angie Zapata. A ruthless, hateful killer had been convicted. Many were elated. I felt sick to my stomach at many folks’ enthusiasm over “justice.” I struggle to understand the “debt of gratitude” people felt towards the State of Colorado [...]

Recently I spent a number of hours talking about my own polyamorous, queer practices with a monogamous, gay man who had fucked himself silly in the 1970s and was forced by religious familial violence into a multi-decade heterosexual marriage dictated by the moral limitations of conservative Christianity. Clearly, this queen suffered. Instead of having a [...]

Dear Slutty-Pants Fence-Humper, Could you give me some advice on telling old lovers that I have HPV?  Or any kind of STD (lets start banking information now…). Particularly, how do I tell former lovers that don’t like me and that are the most likely transfer point. Ethical and Awkward, Mr. Banker-Man Dear MBM, First off [...]

I want to throw a quick shout-out to my friend, libratory badass Queer Radical Kelly Costello at the Colorado Anti-Violence Program who has worked with victims of LGBTQ violence for the past couple years, trained community members to aid folks through crisis, comforted people, and given himself in his entirety to our community. Whether he’s [...]

My friend Eleanor likes to gripe that I’m posing when I claim to be an atheist and often I think she’s right. I don’t particularly believe in a single God, nor do I believe much in organized religion or put much faith in science or “rational thought.” All the above lead to disaster–significant disaster–destabilizing, murderous [...]

Tonight my main squeeze Hill is headed on a first date with a hottie hottie hottie and I’m going out with a fine man too. We’ve each had crushes on both of these people. We’re each flying solo with one. I’m super excited. A first date is always a bit nerve wracking (see my fart [...]